“2 Broke Girls” and the show saver

After giving “2 Broke Girls” more than a fair shake, I’m now fully prepared to write this show off and find a better use of my time (like blogging). It’s sort of a shame because I had wanted to like this show, but it’s simply not funny to me. (That said, more than 10 million households watched Monday’s new episode.)

Many have tried to determine why the show never really lived up to its potential. Some have identified the diner set and the cast of poorly developed characters that populate it as the show’s weakest links, especially because the show has never shied away from exploiting these characters’ stereotypical aspects for cheap and often lame jokes.

An A.V. Club review of Monday’s episode opined they couldn’t rid of the diner although the show’s protagonists wouldn’t be able to continue working there and further their dream of building a cupcake empire.

I quickly fired off a response that they could easily jettison the diner. Doing away with the whole thing might just “save” the show.

What follows is my response, which also displays that I know way too much about this show:

Don’t be silly — of course they can get rid of the diner.

Picture this: Oleg leaves some greasy rags near the stove (why are they greasy? Wouldn’t you like to know, but really don’t because it involves Oleg?)

Anyway, the rags inevitably catch fire, causing the entire diner to burn down in flames. Oleg dies a valiant death trying to put out the fire (insert bad joke about it being the only flames Oleg couldn’t extinguish).

Sophie tries to save her favorite table and collapses from smoke inhalation (and let’s say Chestnut [the horse] dies trying to save her because of a deep relationship that took place entirely off screen).

Han is able to escape, but the smoke seriously damages his vocal cords, causing him to relearn to speak in a non-stereotypical accent.

Max and Caroline weren’t in the restaurant because they were at the Water Department paying a delinquent water bill on their apartment. Their horrible plumbing and leakage jokes take on a tragically ironic note when they realize the extent of the diner disaster.

Max has to take a new job somewhere else because she can’t afford to wait for the diner to be rebuilt. Caroline joins her because she is too distraught at the loss of her beloved Chestnut.

The Garrett Morris character escapes unscathed, because that man is a survivor.

And we all lived happily ever after.

Total: ¥60,428.43

A dozen people liked my comment so far, which is pretty good for me. My most-liked post was the one-word response to an A.V. Club commentary on the longevity of “30 Rock” — banjo.