The karaoke crowd at Paxton Pub in Salt Lake City on Saturday, Feb. 10, 2024.

When I conduct an interview for my job, I generally use courtesy titles such as mister or miss unless the subject tells me it’s OK to use their first name. I don’t want to be overly familiar with people unless I’ve given permission to be less formal. (That said, my stories follow Associated Press style where the courtesy titles are omitted in most situations.)

That sort of came to bite me on the rear about a month ago as I was leaving a karaoke night at Paxton Pub in Salt Lake City. While I was walking outside to my car, I said good night to a younger woman on the patio.

“Good night, sir,” she said, or something like that.

Suddenly, I felt positively ancient.

I’m not used to being called “sir.” That applies in nearly all contexts, but especially in a social situation like a karaoke night. At the same time, I must acknowledge that I’m among the older people at such events these days.

I wondered if this was a feeling that my interview subjects had. After all, I’ve been using courtesy titles while conducting interviews throughout my professional career — including when I was the younger man.

While I’ve always strived to be professional, courteous and respectful, maybe people were put off by my use of courtesy titles.

I don’t think I’m going to change my practice. I just hope that it properly conveys the respect and professionalism that I’m working toward.

And when I’m on the other side of such honorifics, I hope I have the grace to casually wave it off and politely say that it’s totally fine to call me Ryan.